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The Aftermath

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Its been a long few months.. and we are still dealing with the aftermath. We are so thankful to have each other, and supportive friends and family.  I've been slowly writing snippets of what we've learned and been going through as time passes.. and I hope this post might be helpful to anyone going through the same thing <3 ----------------1st Week ------------------------------------------------------------ Things I learned:  1. Medical bills come separately from each and every doctor, even if it's from the same hospital 2. Scammers send fake bills 3. Funeral plots are exponentially more expensive if you purchase them after passing 4. Meal train is the best thing ever- it kept us alive, thankful for the meals everyone sent us.  5. Home health and hospice are SEPARATE, if they accidentally use each other tools, you pay for it, not them.  6. You still have to file taxes for someone who has passed away. (up to their date of death and then for their Estate a

Stella's Life Celebration

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Friday, we chartered a beautiful vintage sailboat and sent off mom in style!  Her ashes were placed into a flower basket and we gently lowered her into the sea.  We shouted "WE LOVE YOU MOM" Petals and flower followed. It was beautiful, she would have loved it. Thank you so much for capturing this special memory for us: Videography: Cotton Love Studios Photography: Eileen Liu Photography ------- Saturday, we followed up with a BBQ celebration for her life! 8/18/08 (she loved those 8's!) It was much bigger than we had originally anticipated and things didn't go as planned haha. We had wanted it to be on Baby Beach in Dana Point. Baby beach is a location filled with fun and activities to do for people of all ages! We wanted to show people the fun place to fish for sardines, to catch crabs, the aquarium/sea learning center and all the fun activities we used to do as children there! Maybe even paddle board, or kayak around the protected harbo

Tiffany's Perspective on the Last Days of Mom's Journey

From Tiffany's Perspective August 14, 2018 Today was the day that mom was cremated. Mom didn't have any specific wishes for when she passed away. She just wanted something small.  So for her cremation,  we wore something bright and colorful so we could send off mom in style, to celebrate and cheer her on her journey. My sister, my dad, and I all picked something that also has something memorable that related to mom. Admittedly after seeing how different mom had looked just a few hours after she passed away on Friday, I was concerned about how she'd appear after waiting in the mortuary for three days. I had a fair amount of experience with cadavers so I had some confidence that I would be okay, but I knew that was not what I wanted my sister to see if mom had advanced further since Friday (or even if she looked the same as she did on Friday night). Mom would not want us to see her in that state. To my surprise, she looked wonderful. She was so peaceful, as though she

Mom has completed her journey

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1:40pm, Friday.  I was standing under the Alaska sign at LAX when I read the text from my Uncle "She passed away" ----------------------------------- 3 hours before that, I was in Santa Rosa. I had just spoken to my sister.  It was urgent, mom was already doing the death rattle.  We had belatedly realized mom's light gurgling was actually the death rattle. It was so quiet, my sister could barely hear it.  Google had informed us it was very loud and more horrifying like a zombie. Google was wrong. I felt so anxious, and I was so afraid I wouldn't make it. I needed to get down there right away. Why didn't I just stay down there? What if I don't make it? Did I tell her everything I want to?  What would I want my last words to her to be??  I forced myself to focus. I could let my mind run once I was on the plane. It was around 11:00am There are so few direct flights from Santa Rosa, I have them all memorized. I knew there was one flight from STS to SNA